The Saturday Seven: Strangest Christmas Gifts Ever

With Christmas just a few days away, I've been thinking about some of the more interesting Christmas gifts that I've received over the years. We all know someone who has a knack of finding and giving strange gifts to unsuspecting recipients. I'm sure you've seen it or experienced this before: You open the box, dig through the tissue paper and get a first glimpse. You feel your face get hot, then your internal voice is shouting: "smile fool, look happy!" An involuntary response kicks in and you find yourself smiling and suddenly you hear yourself saying: "Oh...wow!" As your eyes scan the item, your brain fumbles to work out what the devil it actually is. Then you realize, oh, it's a ______! Just what I've always needed! Well, all this leads me to another scintillating edition of The Saturday Seven: Strangest Christmas Gifts Ever!
#1 Automatic Watch Winder

above: The Double Watch Winder (with drawer) is the perfect accessory for any fine automatic, self-winding watch. Beautifully finished with high-gloss polyester over a genuine teakwood veneer, this watch winder comes with a pull-out drawer for storing six additional watches or personal jewelry. What, is it too much trouble to wind your own watch???

#2 The Banana Guard

above: The Banana Guard: If you are fed up with your lunchtime banana perfuming your workspace and looking unappetisingly bruised and blackened, the Banana Guard is for you. The rigid banana-shaped case with ventilation holes will keep your banana fresh and yellow until you are ready to eat it. This is a really weird one. I had no idea brown bananas were such a problem in the world.

#3 Digital Fruit Clock

above: The Digital Fruit Clock: This fruit powered digital clock and calendar combines micro-electronic technology with the natural electrical potential of a fresh fruit or vegetable. The Fruit Clock uses the original scientific principles on which all modern electrical storage batteries are based. Just add a fresh orange, apple, lemon, lime, pear, banana, or any another convenient fruit or vegetable to the supplied components in this kit and you have the perfect synthesis of nature’s own electrical power resource and the accuracy of a digital clock. But what if I want to eat the Apple? And I suppose I'd have to scratch fresh squeezed orange juice off the list if I had one of these.

#4 Aromatherapy Pens

above: Aromatherapy Pens. A stylish and functional pen with the benefits of Swiss aromatherapy, our smooth writing Swiss Aromatherapy Jewel Pen includes a glass jewelSTIK ™ containing a blend of pure Swiss essential oils and a genuine Napa leather pen glove for added protection. Makes an ideal thank-you gift for any occasion. I don't usually write with pens that much anymore, so if they would only make an aromatherapy laptop...
#5 Electronic Grocery Organizer

above: The Electronic Grocery Organizer. With our SmartShopper Electronic Organizer, you'll never again forget an item at the grocery store or overlook a stop by the bank on the way home. Do away with annoying paper lists that clutter your kitchen countertop, and make compiling and organizing grocery lists and to-do lists incredibly simple. What happened to the old pencil and paper? Or why not just e-mail the list to yourself and use the phone/BlackBerry? Seems like an extra thing to carry around...
#6 Digital Cash Counter

above: Digital Cash Counter. This can be loaded with up to 125 bills, counting 1,000 bills per minute. It also uses UV (ultra violet) and MG (magnetic) protection to detect counterfeit bills. Features an easy-to-read remote digital LED readout. I never have that much cash laying around that I can't handle counting myself. With credit cards and ATM debit cards, who needs cash anymore?
#7 Wheeled Snow Shovel

above: Wheeled Snow Shovel. Clear your driveway — without lifting or straining — using our Wheeled Snow Shovel. Designed to greatly reduce the amount of physical effort required while snow shoveling, this handy winter accessory outperforms snow blowers without the expense, fumes, maintenance, or noise. My suggestion instead? Hire the kid next door to shovel snow and pay him 20 bucks.

Bonus Entry: Coffee Saxon German Incense Smoker

above: German Incense Smoker. This one-of-a-kind Coffee Saxon German Incense Smoker depicts a traditional German "Kaffee" merchant. This antique-looking mantel decoration is sure to delight collectors and children alike. Looks like a useless trinket to me.

What are some of the strangest gifts you've received? I'm running a pre-Christmas sale: ALL COMMENTS ARE HALF PRICE TODAY!
-Rick Rockhill