Saturday, October 20, 2012

Sheldon Gryffindor for President

Campaign Poster by Sir Mac & Lady Alley (SirMacLadyAlley)
The Presidential election in the United States is here whether we like it or not.  I've decided to vote for my very own Sheldon Gryffindor for President in 2012, from the D.O.G Party. I think he would make a fabulous president. His platform makes the most sense of any candidate I've seen in years. He has the best Pawlitical sense of any candidate in years. For starters, he is
committed to nominate the following Canines & Felines to these Cabinet Level Positions:
  • Department of State: Irish Wolfhound
  • Department of Defense: Bulldog
  • Department of Treasury: Basset Hound
  • Department of Justice: Doberman Pinscher
  • Department of Interior: Labrador Retriever
  • Department of Agriculture: Australian Cattle Dog
  • Department of Commerce: Maine Coon Cat
  • Department of Labor: Border Collie
  • Department of Health and Human Services: St Bernard
  • Department of Housing & Urban Development: Alley Cat
  • Department of Transportation: Dalmation
  • Department of Energy: Jack Russell Terrier
  • Department of Education: Standard Poodle
  • Department of Veterans Affairs: Rottweiler
  • Department of Homeland Security: German Shepherd

 Sheldon Gryffindor's Platform:
  •  Right to Pursue Happiness: Supports free belly rubs for everyone
  • Job Stimulus Package: Endorses programs to recycle plush toys, putting countless seamstresses and stuffing people back to work. 
  • Supports new Yappy Hour legislation in all 50 states
  • Taxes: The only tax increase in his budget is a mere $1 per person to feed homeless pets in shelters.
  • The New Deal: Sponsor of the "Done Bone Stimulus Initiative" (DBSI) which puts a new bone in every dog house, donated by private citizens.
  • Health Care: Promotes Spay & Neuter Programs with Low Cost Spay/Neuter Clinics. 
  • Health Care: Supports a bill to provide access to elect affordable vet care insurance funded by the money saved by reducing the IRS Staff by 20%.
  • Health Care: Supports new anti-hairball legislation which will help millions of cats.
  • Business Friendly: Supports Responsible Breeders who also support breed rescue. 
  • Peace Talks: Suggests unilateral peace talks between Petco and Petsmart
  • Equal Rights: Believes in equal rights for small and large breed dogs
  • Mental Health Programs: Suggests a ballot initiative to require mandatory "Take Your Dog To Work Day", everyday
  • Anti-Discrimination: Seeks to overturn anti-pet friendly laws and to allow pets into all restaurants.
  • Low Income Citizens: Supports subsidized dog houses for low income humans, funded from savings by the elimination the unnecessary pennies currently minted and circulated by the Treasury.
  • Marriage: Supports the right to mixed species marriages, dogs + cats would be free to marry.
  • Education: Seeks education reform for humans on proper pet handling and etiquette.
  • Civil Rights: Supports the addition of a new category to dog shows for "Best Mixed Breed Rescue Dog"
  • Commitment to the Environment: Supports Recycled cat litter and recyclable dog poop bags.
Does this sound like a candidate who should be in the White House? VOTE: SHELDON GRYFFINDOR in 2012
special thanks to Sir Mac & Lady Alley for designing the campaign poster!

3 comments:

The Pet Book Lady said...

He definitely has my vote!!

494a428e-9466-11e0-9e9a-000bcdcb2996 said...

Count me in! Four paws up!

Twiggy said...

Sheldon for President!!! Could there be a Department of Efficiency? I work fast!!

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