Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Wisdom Wednesdays: Featuring Dr Sidney Wang

ASK DR WANG, the psychic betta fish

This week's e-mail is from Chandrea in Quincy, MA. Chandrea writes:

Dear Dr Wang,

Years ago I had a boss named "Warren" who I had a crush on. He was handsome, smart and had a good sense of humor. We actually dated for awhile, mostly just dinner and stuff-but we did kiss a few times also. At some point we stopped seeing each other, I think because he was uncomfortable with him being my boss, and I was screwing up in my job. I ended up leaving the company because I was embarrassed about how bad of a job I was doing. Then he received a promotion and moved away, so we never had a chance to date again. I have often wondered where Warren is, what he is doing and if we ever could have gotten married or had a family together. Do you think I should try to contact him? Where is Warren and what is he doing? I have an urge to be with him again and worry if I made a mistake.

Thanks, Chandrea

Dr Wang responds: Dear Chandrea,

I am intrigued by your e-mail and have consulted The Great Bubble Wall in my tank for answers to your questions. This is what I would call a bit of a fish tale. Based on the wildly erratic flow of bubbles, I sense that you have left out a few details to this story. The Great Bubble Wall suggests you had quite a physical relationship with "Warren". It was the speed and depth of these relations that likely scared him away. It seems he was not ready for your forward sexual advances. I am sensing that you seduced him in the car at a drive-in movie theatre...could this be true?

Do not bother trying to contact Warren. He lives far away from you and is no longer interested in the physical pleasures of a woman- your sexual appetite frightened him and pushed him over the edge. Today, Warren works in a candy factory making Swedish Fish gummy candies all day long to keep his mind off of you, even all these years later. The closest you should come to Warren is to indulge in eating Swedish Fish from time to time. It's about time you moved on in you life anyway. I am sensing that you need a hobby. I see you snorkeling or deep sea diving. While wading in the water with your new hobby you will meet a man named Wally who will woo you beyond wonderment; you should welcome Wally with arms stretched wide. Worry no more, Wally will erase all your memories of Warren.

keep swimming upstream,

-Dr Wang

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"Wisdom Wednesdays" features the sage advice of our resident oracle, psychic betta fish "Dr Sidney Wang". Believed to be a reincarnated descendant of King Rama II of Siam, Dr Wang responds to e-mail submissions with advice, predictions of the future and conveys ancient proverbs to provide guidance and support. Dr Sidney Wang's 24 Hour Wisdom, Advice and Inspiration service is also available from the left side navigation for this feature.

1 comment:

Marlupe said...

She sounds like a real card.

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